Freewrite:
Write a narrative discussing what you learned about writing in the Dyson paper and what you learned about the revision process and your revision or rewriting plans per my comments.
This reflection is an essay (2 pages) and it counts as an essay. Be specific in your comments. Use your essay as an example the way you have learned to use Stewart Pidd's essays as examples in your analysis this semester. Include a works cited. This is homework, due Nov. 10.
Write a narrative discussing what you learned about writing in the Dyson paper and what you learned about the revision process and your revision or rewriting plans per my comments.
This reflection is an essay (2 pages) and it counts as an essay. Be specific in your comments. Use your essay as an example the way you have learned to use Stewart Pidd's essays as examples in your analysis this semester. Include a works cited. This is homework, due Nov. 10.
posted by Professor Wanda's Posse at 10:55 AM
5 Comments:
Anaya Odom
English 1A
10 Nov 2009
The process of writing my Dyson paper was one that was not to difficult. The reading was interesting so I was able to comprehend what I was reading and reiterate it as best as I could. In writing this paper, I learned how to properly include quotations in my paper. I also learned how to use my punctuation correctly as far as semi-colons and commas, and when it is proper to use each one. When I looked over my essay myself, I felt that it was well written. I brought it to school, and Eric reviewed it, and he also said that he thought it was well written. However, when I turned it in I got a paper back with a few corrects, not many, but a few. I had to make corrections in capitalization, and also add more information. I made a mistake by introducing a character and not giving background information on them. To correct that I included more information about the people, so that the reader could know who they were even if they had never heard of them. Some examples from my paper are Nat Turner and Machavelli, who were both people that Tupac had knowledge of. In my paper I added a couple sentences surrounding my statement, explaining who they were and what they did to become famous. One I finished making the corrections that were pointed out, I felt my essay was better and more smoother reading. So all in all I feel confident about the paper that I turned in, after the corrections were made.
Erik Del Nero
English 1A
Professor Wanda Sabir
11, Nov. 2009
Process of Holler Paper
The first thing that I did when I wrote this paper is made the paper read like an outline. That told me my outline was good but the paper was not. When I was told that my paper was not written well, I felt a bit of disappointment. So, I took a base of action and talk to my teacher on how I should write it which helped a lot.
When I began to rewrite my essay on my chapter I reread my notes and put that plus what my teacher said together. I had a lot to say about my chapter since it reflects mainly on his relationship with his mother. As I was sitting their typing away I began to feel Tupac’s pain.
When I was talking to my teacher about what I should write and she gave me lots of examples, which helped write about my chapter. Since I did it wrong the first time I wrote it, I had to start over completely. Starting an assignment over completely makes me feel horrible, because I put a lot of effort in the assignment. On the other hand starting an assignment over is kind of good because you now know what not to do.
I also learn what I should put in the essay and what not to put in the essay. I decided to use some of the same things but not all. In my mind some of the things I said in my outline were quite accurate. I decided to keep my poem in because it goes with the title of the chapter I was doing. The chapter was very touching because of the type of relationship he had with his mother.
In conclusion, I think my paper turned out pretty good since I hade to write it twice. It made it seem easier since I knew what I should and should not put in. Tupac’s life was quite out of the ordinary at least for my taste of what a childhood should be like.
Reflecting on My Tupac’s Resilience Essay
While first writing my Tupac essay I decided to base it off of Tupac’s fate. After completing that essay I had one of my mentors revise it for me and she helped me realize that I my thesis was unclear and that I was not proving anything about Tupac’s fate within my essay but that I was instead proving his resilience. When she told me this I didn’t know what it meant so she explained it to me and also suggested that I looked it up. After realizing that my essay would function more efficiently if I wrote about Tupac’s resilience, I added a thesis to prove that statement as well as changed my topic sentences and got rid of the large amount of concrete details that infested my paper.
After making the first change to my paper, I turned it into my teacher hoping for a good grade in return. Little did I know that she would give my essay back along with a few suggestions. She helped me to see that my essay was very unclear and had too much unnecessary commentary within my body paragraphs. She also gave me some advice; she informed me about some evidence from the book I could use in order to prove my thesis. I took her advice and began to rearrange my essay and get rid of a lot of unnecessary information in my essay.
This was now the third time I was rewriting my essay. I was unsure if my essay was exceptional so I decided to let another one of my mentors revise it while at work and she helped me to see that I was being a bit repetitive and stating the obvious. Instead of pushing me out on my own to correct my errors she sat down and corrected it with me. But after we finished I still was just a bit unsure if it was exceptional or not. I decided to let my English seminar teacher review it and she let me know that it was extremely disorganized, held too much information, and my thesis was a bit broad. After meeting with her I felt that my essay would be perfect after revision. I revised my essay and turned it in the same day.
In the end I had edited my essay five times. I used Stewart Pidd Hate’s English by Pollitt Baker to make sure that my essay had no grammar or punctuation error. During my revision process I used the Pidd book to help me correct my minor errors such as my parenthetical citations; I would forget where I needed to place the quotation marks, parenthesis, and period at the end of the quote. To help me I looked in my Pidd book and found that the authors name should be placed in the signal phrase, and the page number must follow it in parenthetical citation with a period to end the sentence (321). I also had to make sure I was using my ellipses correctly so I looked in my Pidd book for an answer. I found that one shall use a period followed by ellipses at the end of a quote with no parenthetical citation. I also found that when one does use parenthetical citation that they shall use ellipses followed by the closing quotation mark, the parenthetical citation, and a period after (324). I feel that by using the Pidd book that my essay was better than it was before.
Works Cited
Pollitt, Gary, and Craig Baker. Stewart Pidd Hates English. Fullerton, CA: Attack Text
Publishing, 2009.
When I began to rewrite my essay on my chapter I reread my notes and put that plus what my teacher said together. I had a lot to say about my chapter since it reflects mainly on his relationship with his mother. As I was sitting their typing away I began to feel Tupac’s pain.
I learned what I should put in the essay and what not to put in the essay. I decided to use some of the same things but not all. In my mind some of the things I said in my outline were quite accurate. I decided to keep my poem in because it goes with the title of the chapter I was doing. The chapter was very touching because of the type of relationship he had with women.
Debbie Adame
english 1A
When I began to write my essay on the introduction and on the chapter that i wrote, my mind was set up upon the music, poems, and the book that was writting on Tupac. I focus all my eyes on Tupacs life and his poetry that gave me a better understanding of Tupacs life and the struggles that he face in order to suceed and survive in life. I also learned that his poetry was based on philosophers and famous poets that reach out his mind in theory of understand a better way of education, since Tupac was not into school. Thru music he found the way to educate and reach other thru his words by giving and teaching them about life. Also he wanted the upper class to know that lower class can become successful and not be giving the benefit of doubt just because they are poor and "gettho." i believe that thru struggles you become successful and achive higher goals because your learned form mistakes and struggles!
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