Cyber-Assignment
Homework this evening is to post your literal and free paraphrases for the week per your article.
One was due Monday and the second was due Tuesday and another Wednesday. We swapped work again this morning. students commented on each others' work, noting when writers successfully maintained the intent of the original. This attention to the intent or commitment to a translation or interpretation which honors the integrity of the original work is key to a successful paraphrase.
One of your paraphrasing assignments this week asked you to reflect on the act of paraphrasing , both literal and free, to discuss its difficulties and benefits, both short and long term.
Post all of those assignments here (Monday-Thursday, January 24-28). If you have posted the assignments elsewhere, repost them here as well. Try to always post the assignments where they are due, otherwise, you will not get credit for your work.
Homework this evening is to post your literal and free paraphrases for the week per your article.
One was due Monday and the second was due Tuesday and another Wednesday. We swapped work again this morning. students commented on each others' work, noting when writers successfully maintained the intent of the original. This attention to the intent or commitment to a translation or interpretation which honors the integrity of the original work is key to a successful paraphrase.
One of your paraphrasing assignments this week asked you to reflect on the act of paraphrasing , both literal and free, to discuss its difficulties and benefits, both short and long term.
Post all of those assignments here (Monday-Thursday, January 24-28). If you have posted the assignments elsewhere, repost them here as well. Try to always post the assignments where they are due, otherwise, you will not get credit for your work.
posted by Professor Wanda's Posse at 6:05 PM
40 Comments:
Jacqueline Garrido
English 1a
Wanda Sabir
8:00am-8:50am
January 27th, 2010
“How We Grew So Big?”
“It’s natural to try to find something to blame- fast-food joints or food manufacturers or even ourselves for having too little willpower. But the ultimate reason for obesity may be rooted deep within our genes. Obedient to the inexorable laws of evolution, the human race adapted over millions of years to living in a world of scarcity, where it paid to eat every good-tasting thing in sight when you could find it.”[Time Magazine]
It’s natural to try to find something to blame such as fast-food joints, food manufacturers or ourselves for not controlling our diet. But have you ever thought the reason for obesity may be within our genes? The laws of evolution have proven that the human race adapted over millions of years into living in a world of scarcity. Where it pays to eat everything good in sight, if you could find it. [Literal]
I believe literal paraphrase is an amazing idea to understand the text but, is plagiarism. It personally helps me understand the text when I don’t understand the reading. Along, with different tactics along the years. Thus, I recommend people to use this tactic only if you can’t understand the text. Otherwise, its plagiarism due to the fact that you are using copying somebody’s work through changing their words. In conclusion, people should paraphrase texts carefully due to the fact, that its plagiarism.
Juan Li
English 1A
Jan/28/2010
This is the summaries from, "After a life".
Mr and Mrs Su are reserved. They have a son who is studing in college and not so colse to them. Their son spends mose his free time with his friend's family. Mr and Mrs Su don't have time to care about other people including their son.
http://www.prospectmagazine.co.uk/2005/04/afteralife/
Taylor Tokareff
English1A 9a-9:50a
It’s beyond midnight and there is only one light blazing at the Raider’s world headquarters. It is in the office of coach Al Davis, who is orchestrating a single person think tank, as he plans the next move for his failing team. Tiredly the old man stood up and hobbled through the corroder. He enters a brown doo and is overwhelmed by light. Covering his eyes with his hands, he spots metal walls, a dark rug and a pompous desk, behind it is his fifty four year old self.
“I’m confused, this is not the bathroom.” “Don’t be afraid enter.” “Don’t I know you?” “I’m you twenty six years ago the morning after the last Super Bowl you won.” “That was a good game, we dominated the Washington Red Skins. I was in a hotel but I didn’t see you.” “Sure I was because I’m you” “Ya right, what do you want?” “I’m going to the grade you.” “Grade me? But I’m in charge!”
Joshua Duong
Eng 1A- 8am-8:50am
Literal Paraphrase
The clock stops for no being, yet Andre Agassi has somehow, managed to change the rules. Nobody would have thought back in 1988 - when the "bad boy" of tennis made it into the top ten with the frizzy hair and the pale skin - that the Vegas born entertainer would be in the same place seventeen years later?
Tennis has grown a lot since Agassi won his first ATP Masters Series event by defeating Stefan Edberg at Key Biscayne in 1990 and got his seventeenth title by beating Lleyton Hewitt in Cincinnati more than a decade and a half later.
Free Paraphrase
No mere mortal can stop time, but somehow Agassi has managed to rewrite the rules. No one would have thought this messy haired, bad mouthed tennis player, when breaking into the top ten in the world, would stay there for more than a decade later?
Since Agassi won his first ATP Master Series event, beating Stefan Edberg in the finals, there has been an explosion of growth in the tennis world. He has proven himself to be one of the greatest tennis players to ever play the game, when at the age of 35, an age that most tennis pro are retired, won his seventeenth ATP title, beating of the top young guns of that era, in the finals of that tournament.
*** re-posting ***
Zaidea Magpoc
English 1A 9-9:50am
Literal Paraphrase and Free Paraphrase
Passage 1 - Literal Paraphrase
One false step last summer was all it took for Debi Thorkelson and twist her knee so badly she couldn't even bend her leg. After an MRI revealed that she'd ripped a major ligament, the physician said that she has to have a surgery. "I am uninsured, and the treatment was more than $41,000, not comprising the hospital stay, states Thorkelson.
Then her husband recalled a show he'd watched about Americans having medical treatment in Panama, at very low prices. He found a travel agency that paired patients with doctors overseas. The agency endorsed a U.S. trained doctor practicing at the Clinica Biblica Hospital in San Jose, Costa Rica. The over-all expenses? Just below $4,000 for surgery, plane tickets and 9 days in a newly opened rehab center.
Thorkelson is one of half a million Americans who went abroad last year to places like Brazil, Costa Rica, Singapore, Thailand and India for procedures like hip and knee replacement, heart and gynecological surgery, even cancer and experimental procedures such as stem-cell therapy states Josef Woodman, writer of Patients Beyond Borders, the first detailed guide to medical travel. A lot of experts have confidence that outsourcing health care is the new trend; while some believe that risks comes with it - long distance travel, unknown doctors, little recourse if things go wrong - make it an unwise and sometimes risky alternative. "Medical tourism is intensely free from harm if patients do their research and understand what they're getting into before they go." states Woodman.
Passage 1 - Free Paraphrase
Last summer, Debi Thorkelson made a false step and twist her knee severely she couldn't even bend her leg. The physician said that she has to have a surgery, after an MRI revealed that she'd ripped a major ligament. "The treatment was more than $41,000 not comprising the hospital stay.
There is a show that featured Americans having medical treatment in Panama, at very low prices which her husband recall watching. He contacted a travel agency that paired up patients with doctors overseas. A U.S. trained doctor practicing at the Clinica Biblica Hospital in San Jose, Costa Rica was endorsed by the agency. How much is the over-all expenses? For surgery, plane tickets and nine days stay in a newly opened rehab center, just below $4,000.
Places like Brazil, Costa Rica, Singapore, Thailand and India do procedures like hip and knee replacement, cancer and experimental procedures such as stem-cell therapy heart and gynecological surgery, states Josef Woodman, writer of Patients Beyond Borders, the first detailed guide to medical travel. Outsourcing health care is the new trend and lot of experts have confidence in it ; while some believe that risks comes with it - unknown doctors, little recourse if things go wrong, long distance travel - make it an unwise and sometimes risky alternative. Woodman said, "Medical tourism is intensely free from harm if patients do their research and understand what they're getting into before they go."
Passage 2 to be continued...
*** continuation ***
Zaidea Magpoc
English 1A 9-9:50 am
Literal Paraphrase and Free Paraphrase
Passage 2 – Literal Paraphrase
The number of patients going from one place to another for care is increasing fast, Karen Timmons said, Head of the Joint Commission International (JCI), an association liable for evaluating and endorsing U.S. hospitals. “With medical expenses continuing to go up, the number of people without insurance is rising, the globalization of health care is about to increase sharply”, she says.
Rudy Rupak, the Head and the person who established California based hospital, one of many organizations that plan medical trips abroad, says business is growing rapidly. Rupak said, “Last year, we handled 10 to 12 patients a month. Now it’s 3 to 5 a day.” Some U.S. organizations and insurance firms even pay medical expenses abroad. Blue Cross Blue Shield of South Carolina recently started offering health care in Thailand, Singapore, Turkey, Ireland and Costa Rica and dental care in Costa Rica as well, to its 1.5 million members.
“Soon insurance firms will began compensating to support patients who desire to obtain care overseas”, says Sander Domaszewicz, of Mercer, a human resources consulting company. “For example, is a worker requires a non-life-threatening procedure like a hip replacement”, she might be told, “You have choices. There are four or five facilities abroad that can do the procedure at a sixth of the U.S. price. If you pick one, we’ll waive your co-payment or share of the cost.”
For the majority of patients and companies, big savings are the obvious appeal. Almost 62 million Americans are uninsured or are underinsured and more than 100 million lack dental coverage. Sickness and medical expenses are major reason of personal bankruptcy, stated by a 2005 Harvard University study. Procedure in overseas hospitals is a bargain: a root canal may be $280 instead of $750; a hysterectomy $3,000 to $6,000 instead of $20,000; a heart-valve replacement $9,000 to $12,000 instead of $160,000.
Passage 2 – Free Paraphrase
Karen Timmons said, Head of the Joint Commission International (JCI), an association liable for evaluating and endorsing U.S. hospitals, “The number of patients going from one place to another for care is rising, add the medical expenses continuing to go up, the globalization of health care is about to increase sharply.
The Head and the person who established California-based Planet Hospital, one of many organizations that plan medical trips abroad, Rudy Rupak says, “Business is growing rapidly. We handled 10 to 12 patients a month last year. Now it’s 3 to 5 a day.” Medical expenses abroad are being paid by some U.S. organizations and insurance firms. Health care in Thailand, Singapore, Turkey, Ireland and Costa Rica, and dental care in Costa Rica were offered by Blue Cross Blue Shield of South Carolina to its 1.5 million members.
Sander Domaszewicz, of Mercer, human resources consulting company said, “For patients desiring to obtain care overseas, soon insurance firms will begin compensating them as support. If a worker requires a non-life threatening procedure like a hip replacement”, she might be told, “There are four or five facilities abroad that can do the procedure at a sixth of the U.S. price. You have choices. We’ll waive your co-payment or share the cost, if you pick one.”
Big savings are the obvious appeal for the majority of companies and patients. Almost 62 million Americans are uninsured or are underinsured and more than 100 million lack dental coverage. Stated by a 2005 Harvard University study, major reason of personal bankruptcy are sickness and medical expenses. A root canal may be $280 instead of $750; a hysterectomy $3,000 to $6,000 instead of $20,000; a heart-valve replacement $9,000 to $12,000 instead of $160,000; procedures in overseas hospitals are a bargain.
*** Reflection: ***
Zaidea Magpoc
English 1A 9-9:50am
I find the paraphrasing very helpful to me. My vocabulary is expanding more since I am constantly looking for the synonyms of the words. My grammar is being improved too because of rearranging the sentence structure.
Cortny Lozano
English 1A
8:00am-8:50am
January 28,2010
Literal&Free Paraphrasing
"When You Should Hold A Grudge"
http://www.oprah.com/spirit/When-to-Forgive-and-When-to-Hold-a-Grudge-Martha-Beck_1/2
Passage 1
A)Literal Paraphrase
For instance, I was once contacted by a freelance Tv Producer I'll call Fred, who wanted to introduce a life-coaching reality film. During a gathering with a network executive, I was surprised to hear Fred lie. Later he explained briefly, "You have to say what you have to say." This, as my daughters sometimes referred it, did not gruntle me. But despite my disgruntlement, I overlooked the incident.
B)Free Paraphrase
For instance, a life-coaching reality film,created by a Tv Producer I'll introduce as Fred, contacted me. I was surprised to hear Fred lie during a gathering with a network executive. "You have to say what you have to say", he briefly explained. This did not gruntle me, as my daughters sometimes referred. I overlooked the incident, despite my disgruntlement.
Cortny Lozano
English 1A 8am-8:50am
"When You Should Hold A Grudge"
Passage 2:
A)Literal Paraphrase
Within a week, by pure coincidence (or was it?), three others mentioned they knew Fred. One was a woman he'd dated, another a co-worker, and his sister's high school friend-and all of them cautiously pointed out "honesty issues." Three strikes, plus one bad experience of my own, meant I put on a psychological Kevlar vest. I told Fred I'd agree not to work with him, and directly felt much more relaxed.
I've leaned through disturbing experience that when I start to oddly doubt myself around a particular person, it's time to hold a good effective grudge. Me? I doubt myself relentlessly (rethinking impulse purchases, lying awake listening to myself wrinkle, and so on), but what I'm talking about is much more alarming self-doubt: the kind that surfaces when reality seems to bend and sway around a certain person, when my combinations don't jibe with what that person claims and their stories glide smoothly around any factual inaccuracies I may point out.
Flurries of this dizzy sensation bound indivisuals who have secrets and hidden schedules.Psychologists use the term gaslighting to characterize this type of systematic lying-an allusion to an old film in which a man drives his spouse to question her sanity by telling her lies and manipulating the level of gaslight in the house so that she keeps seeing lights dim for no apparent reason.
When this happens to you, you've officially reached a "hard hat" area. If you don't carry a protective grudge against a gaslighter, you really might go crazy.
Consider Cindy. She worked beside Danielle for months before observing she felt strangely awkward at the office. "I doubted myself in ways I never had before," Cindy told me. "Ultimately I realized that I always felt most bewildered after dealing with Danielle." Things got so rough that Cindy (feeling sheepish and paranoid) called one of Danielle's former employers to ask how he'd interacted with her. Surprise! Cindy discovered that the job on Danielle's resume never existed. Kicking into sleuth mode, Cindy exposed that much of Danielle's resume was fiction.
B)Free paraphrase continued....
Cortny Lozano
English 1A 8am-8:50am
B)Free Paraphrase
Three others mentioned to me they were familiar with Fred, by pure coincidence shortly after the incident took place. All of them cautiously mentioned "honesty issues"-one woman he'd dated, another a co-worker, and last his sister's high school good friend. The results meant I wear a psychological Kevlar vest came from the third strike plus one bad experience of my own. I automatically felt relieved once I told Fred I'd chose not to work with him.
A good time for a effective grudge is when I start oddly doubting myself around a particular person. Me? I continuously doubt myself, but what I'm discussing is much more alarming self-doubt: (rethinking impulse purchases, lying awake, listening to myself and so on). I may point out their claims and stories that concern me.
Indivisuals who have secrets and hidden schedules are surrounded by the flurries of this dizzy sensation. To characterize, this type of systematic lying, psychologists use the term gaslighting-an allusion to an older film in which a wife questions her sanity because her husband manipulates and tells her odd lies about the level of gaslight in the house so that she continuously keeps seeing the lights dim for no reason.
A "hard hat" is considered once this officially happens to you. There is a chance of going crazy if you don't carry a protective grudge against a gaslighter.
Consider Cindy. She finally felt strange at the office after working beside Danielle for months. Cindy mentioned, "I doubted myself in ways I never had before." After dealing with Danielle for months, I ultimately realized that I always felt bewildered. Cindy (feeling sheepish and paranoid) contacted a former employer of Danielle's. The situation became extremely hard thatCindy had to ask how he interacted with her. Surprise! Cindy came across the false job listed on Danielle's resume. Jumping into sleuth mode, that much of Danielle's resume was exposed to be fiction.
Cortny Lozano
English 1A 8am-8:50am
-Reflection on Review-
The paraphrasing review seemed to be very helpful. In the beginning I was confused about the difference between a literal paraphrase and a free paraphrase. I feel I'm improving plus SPHE is a good resource. This is preparing me for the essays coming up.
Juan Li
English 1A
Jan/28/2010
1. Orginal passage from article
http://www.prospectmagazine.co.uk/2005/04/afteralife/
A Literal paraphrase 1
B Literal paraphrase 2
C Free paraphrase
A, Literal paraphrase
When the telephone was ringing, Mr and Mrs Su were finishing their breakfast. Nither Mr nor Mrs Su wanted to pick it up at first. Not so many people use their home phone to get tauch with them because not many people know their number. Once a month their son Jian, who is a sophomore in college calls them to tell them how he is doing. He usually spends his free time with his friend's families and he doesn't even give them a poor excuse. Mr and Mrs Su wish to see their son more often, but they don't want to upset themselv and Jian by complaning.
B Literal paraphrase
While the telephone was ringing, Mr and Mrs Su were finishing their breakfast. Nither Mr or Mrs Su wasn't want to pick it up at first. Not so many people use their home phone and even not so many people knew it. Once a month their son Jian who is a sophonmore in college calls them for reporting he is doing good. He usually spends his free time with his friend's families and don't even say something about it.Mr and Mrs Su wish to see their son more often, but they don't want to upset themselvs by complaning.
C Free paraphrase
Just right after Mr and Mrs Su finished their breakfast that only few people knew the phone rains. Of couse neither of them wanted to pick it up. They don't like someone bothering them in the early morning. They don't even want to complaing their son. He is sophomore in college and spends his most free time with his friends families. He only calls them once a month.
summaries from, "After a life".
Mr and Mrs Su are reserved. They have a son who is studing in college and not so colse to them. Their son spends mose his free time with his friend's family. Mr and Mrs Su don't have time to care about other people including their son.
Kimthuy Tran
Professor Sabir
M-Thur 9-9:50
Literal paraphrases
As we have a influenza vaccination in the cold time of the year, we not only reduce H1N1- swine flu’s threats. This also protect our family’s members’ health, for whenever we immunize to H1N1 virus, we secure people whom we love.
Every time our body have a vaccination, we create a shelter that guard for our resides, coworkers, and even people who are near us on the aircraft.
In April, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention discovers that 10,000 American citizens died because of H1N1 disease. In addition, 213,000 citizens have serious sick in medical centers.
Free paraphrases.
Having a flu vaccination in cold time of the year helps us to reduce
the dangers that H1N1 ( swine flu) impacts to our health. Furthermore, getting vaccine creates an immunity system in our body, so the virus can not attack to our antibody, and we don’t infect to people around us such as family’s members or coworker. A research of the Center of Disease Control and Prevention also finds that there are many people in the US are died and have serious sickness in medical centers in April.
Reflecting paraphrasing
I like free paraphrasing more than literal paraphrasing, for it is hard for me to find synonyms that are fit to the sentence structure of the
original writing. Moreover, practicing to use free paraphrasing helps my vocabulary getting more profound. However, we will not miss any ideas of the author if they use literal paraphrasing, and importantly we know to avoid using it in our writing.
Arely Razo
Professor Sabir
English 1A
25 January 2010
Literal Paraphrase
Original Text:
What’s more, Chews adoption process has been thrown into chaos. She believes the attorney working on her case maybe dead, and the courthouse with the official adoption documents was destroyed in the quake. She feels trapped. A9
Literal Paraphrase:
Chew’s adoption has been added to a mess of people. She thinks the person assisting her with the adoption has past away and that the office containing the papers has been ruined. She feels stuck.
Original Text:
“I had made great strides in the (adoption) process, including hiring an adoption attorney and had given a $4,000 deposit. All is lost!” Chew wrote on Tuesday. A9
Literal Paraphrase:
“I had good luck in the beginning with the espousal, getting a lawyer and money to help me pay for the process. Nothing is left. “Chew said on Tuesday.”
Original Paraphrase:
Yet there is a glimmer of hope in the form of possible visa waivers from the U.S. for children who have ties to families here, either biological or adoptive. A 9
Literal Paraphrase:
So far there is faith in that Americans will give a permit to those kids that have relatives that are going to adopt or are birth parents.
Work Cited
Hill, Angela. “Guarding waiting, hoping in Haiti.” Alameda Times-Star 23 Jan. 2010: A9.
Arely Razo
Professor Sabir
English 1A
25 January 2010
Literal Paraphrase
Original text:
“I was greatly distressed about the thought of starting all over,“ Chew wrote, “But today, I am now hopeful as I received an encouraging email from home.” A9
Literal Paraphrase:
“I was no happy with the idea of having top begin again. Chew stated, “But today, I am now hopeful as I received an encouraging email from home.”
Original text:
“There are waivers they’re providing for people who were adopting children, and trying to get them to the U.S.,” Rhonda Chew said. “We hope this will work for my sister. We have to do something. She won’t leave without her daughters, and we want to get her home.” A9
Literal Paraphrase:
“Waivers are being given to the people who are trying to adopt kids to bring them to the U.S.,” Rhonda Chew stated. “She hopes that this will help her sibling. Peoples help is needed. Her sister will not depart without the girls and she is wanted home.”
Original text:
“I cannot start over and I don’t want to miss this blessing!’ Chew wrote. “I have longed for the day my Ruth and my Naomi to be liberated from the third-world nation of their birth. I can taste their freedom. I have prayed for their release, for two-and-a-half years now. I long for the three of us to be on U.S. soil together.” A9
Literal Paraphrase:
“I would not want to begin this once more and do not want to miss this opportunity!” Chew said. “I have been waiting for the day that Ruth and Naomi would be free of the country they were born in. I have hoped for them to be given to me, for almost three years. I can’t wait until we are together in the U.S.”
Original text:
“The fuel and food is running out rapidly, as many are buying from our area,” she wrote. “As a mother, this heightens the anxiety for me, making sure to keep Ruth and Naomi in my reach at all time. A9
Literal Paraphrase:
“Utilities such as fuel and food are finishing quickly from our area because of the people purchasing, she stated. “As a mom this worries me, I make sure to keep Ruth and Naomi next to me.
Original text:
“It seems trivial of me to be concerned about such matters when so many mothers here in Haiti actually lost their children to this earthquake,” she wrote. “The former principal of the school where I teach lost his wife. He now has a 5-year-old to rear on his own. the students and the others here who knew his wife are grieving much. A9
Literal Paraphrase:
“It is of little importance for me to worry of these things when a quantity of moms have lost their kids in this tragedy,” she stated. “The former principal of the school where I teach lost his wife. He now has to raise his five year old by himself. Faculty and alumni knew his wife and all feel the pain.
Original text:
“So much sorrow in Part-au-Prince. Each day the number of the dead increase. Many were still alive, but rescue was not able to reach them in time. Now the horrifying smell as the bodies decay. The survivors are hungry and really thirsty. With that comes desperation, violence, and pandemonium.” A9
Literal Paraphrase:
“So much sorrow in Part-au-Prince. Every day more people are losing their lives. Some people still live, but there is no one to help them. It smells of death. The people alive need food and water. This causes anxiety, brutality and mayhem.
Original text:
Chew ended her transmission with a prayer request, asking friends and family to pray for Haiti, for “the healing of the nation, both physical and spiritual. For protection for the three of us, for YWAM, and for all the relief workers, for emotional strength and for direction and clarity from God.” A9
Literal Paraphrase:
Chew concluded her article with asking family members and friends to pray for the mental and divine of Haiti. Also, for the safety of her and the girls, for YWAM, for the relief workers and for the help of God.
Work Cited
Hill, Angela. “Guarding waiting, hoping in Haiti.” Alameda Times-Star 23 Jan. 2010: A9.
Arely Razo
Professor Sabir
English 1A
25 January 2009
Reflection
I think that the process of writing a literal paraphrase is easy because it is pretty much writing the same thing, but just using different synonyms. I personally think that it was easier for me because I had received some practice last semester. I still prefer to write free paraphrases because it is writing the sentences in my own words. Some of the words are not that easy to find a synonym for. My article had very short sentences and a few of the things were quoted. Although some of the things were in quotation marks, I still tried to change what it said. I think that this article wasn’t as easy to paraphrase because some of the words I did not know what to replace it with. I think that writing literal paraphrase will help me distinguish the difference from what is plagiarized and what is not.
Arely Razo
Professor Sabir
English 1A
26 January 2010
Free Paraphrase
Original text:
“There are waivers they’re providing for people who were adopting children, and trying to get them to the U.S.,” Rhonda Chew said. “We hope this will work for my sister. We have to do something. She won’t leave without her daughters, and we want to get her home.” A9
Free Paraphrase:
People that are trying to adopt children are being given aid, so that they can bring them to the United States. Rhonda wants her sister back home and she is eager that this will help her so that they can be together once more.
Original text:
“I cannot start over and I don’t want to miss this blessing!’ Chew wrote. “I have longed for the day my Ruth and my Naomi to be liberated from the third-world nation of their birth. I can taste their freedom. I have prayed for their release, for two-and-a-half years now. I long for the three of us to be on U.S. soil together.” A9
Free Paraphrase:
Chew cannot wait to have her daughters with her, and would not like to have to begin the whole process once more. She has been waiting for them to be given to her for almost three years now and wants to be home with them in the United States.
Original text:
“The fuel and food is running out rapidly, as many are buying from our area,” she wrote. “As a mother, this heightens the anxiety for me, making sure to keep Ruth and Naomi in my reach at all time. A9
Free Paraphrase:
Many of the things that are needed to survive with are being bought by other people and that is making them run out of necessities. This makes Chew worry because she would not like her girls to starve or dehydrate and that’s why she keep them with her at all times.
Original text:
“It seems trivial of me to be concerned about such matters when so many mothers here in Haiti actually lost their children to this earthquake,” she wrote. “The former principal of the school where I teach lost his wife. He now has a 5-year-old to rear on his own. the students and the others here who knew his wife are grieving much. A9
Free Paraphrase:
The earthquakes was a big tragedy and it caused many families to be separated. A faculty of the school where Chew works at has lost his loved one. Now he is the one that is in charge of raising their child. A lot of the people feel bad and some can relate to him.
Original text:
“So much sorrow in Part-au-Prince. Each day the number of the dead increase. Many were still alive, but rescue was not able to reach them in time. Now the horrifying smell as the bodies decay. The survivors are hungry and really thirsty. With that comes desperation, violence, and pandemonium.” A9
Free Paraphrase:
Everyone feels bad and sad about what is going on in Haiti. More and more people are dying because of this tragedy. Some people were able to live but weren’t able to get the help that they needed. Death is what this country reeks of now. Hunger and dehydration is what these people are suffering of. This is also cause many problems and some diseases.
Original text:
Chew ended her transmission with a prayer request, asking friends and family to pray for Haiti, for “the healing of the nation, both physical and spiritual. For protection for the three of us, for YWAM, and for all the relief workers, for emotional strength and for direction and clarity from God.” A9
Free Paraphrase:
It is asked of people to have hope and faith for the people that are in Haiti so that things in the lives of people can improve, as well as, the state. These people would like to be safe, have a new beginning, vigor and help from God.
Work Cited
Hill, Angela. “Guarding waiting, hoping in Haiti.” Alameda Times-Star 23 Jan. 2010: A9.
Arely Razo
Professor Sabir
English 1A
26 January 2010
Reflection
Personally writing free paraphrases is something that I view is a lot easier than a literal phrase. This is now my second year that I am working on this type of paraphrases. I like that I can just put the things in my own words and don’t have to make it exactly the same as the original quote. The only thing is that the paraphrase has to be talking about the same thing that was written in the original text. It makes it easier for me to cite something in my paper and not have so many long quotes. I think that it is not as complicated. This in the future will help me not plagiarize and will make writing my paper more of my own thought.
Edith Gonzalez
English 1A-9am
January 24-28
Article: http://www.howstuffworks.com/street-gang.htm
Literal Paraphrase
Gang violence is an issue in just about every major city in the United States and gang involvement is on the rise. According to the department of Justice’s 2005 Natural Gang Threat Assessment, there are found to be at least 21,500 gangs and more than 731,000 active gang members. While gangs are found less in rural areas, in major cities, gang violence is held accountable for approximately half of all homicides. Gangs are also becoming trendier, using computers and other technology to commit felonies.
Collecting accurate statistics on gangs and gang involvement is challenging for numerous reasons. Gangs obviously gather official records of their membership. Some individuals may spend time with gang members, but aren’t actually gang members themselves. If a person “runs with” a gang, but hasn’t been let in yet, is that individual considered a member?
Free Paraphrase
It’s critical to think about the source of the data. If a police officer questions a gang member, “Are you in a gang?” most likely the gang member will answer no, aware that the police pays more attention to known gang members. Some adolescents join gangs to seem tough around their peers. Police departments don’t always report gang statistics accurately; sometimes federal gangs for fighting gang violence can give departments permission to over estimate gang numbers, while other departments reject the idea of having any gang problems at all to not alert the public.
In a recreation for juvenile justice, they use a number of police reports to estimate the percentage of street gangs based on ethnicities. Their results turned out to be that 49% of gang members are Hispanic, 37% were lack, 8% were white, 5% were Asian, and 1% were other.
Reflection on Paraphrasing
I find paraphrasing to be simple, yet difficult at times. The reason why I find it challenging at times is because without the help of a dictionary it can be difficult to find synonyms for some subject and verb words. Or sometimes the word that you need to substitute you might not know the meaning of, so a dictionary can really held out when doing that exercises.
I think that overall understanding and knowing how to paraphrase is a very good useful tool when it comes to writing. One reason could be is because if you know how to paraphrase you can avoid plagiarism. I’ve never had a problem with plagiarism because I always take what I read and put it in my words making sure that I let my reader know
Lisa Huey
9:00AM-9:50AM
English 1A
(Free paraphrase and Literal paraphrase. original article and short essay is posted on another post)
"Your Field Guide to Guys" By Josh Aiello
Free Paraphrase: The workaholic: What he has that is more expensive than yours, is his clothing. Through a crazy need to build money, he states his manhood. While using his blackberry phone all the time, he works about 90 hours in 7 days. To woo you, he would purchase you valuable that no reasonable women would deny. To tell if there lies a real guy beyond the wealth, there is a literary test. he is decent if he snoozes on an airbed at your parent's residence. He is not the one if she wakes up grouchy and gets a hotel.
the pickup artist: His style intellect and wonderful hair astonishes you. After seeing him wearing a shark tooth necklace and his hand manicured, you think to yourself "red flag!" Like a general intrigues in battle, he gets ready for a date plotting and planning his moves. Dating is an activity to him and you should keep that in mind. An experiment of his maturity, you are like Mt Everest in heels. You will have to be his match in order to win his love. Call him out on his strategies while beating him at his own sport.
Literal Paraphrase:
The workaholic: his clothing is more expensive than yours. he states his manhood through a crazy need to build money. Works a 90-hour week and most likely uses his blackberry all the time. Tries to get you buy purchasing you valuable no reasonable women would deny. It can be difficult to see whether there lies a real guy beyond the wealth, so here's a literary test: if he snoozes on an airbed at your parents' residence without whining, he is decent. If on the other hand, he wakes up grouchy and get a hotel, he is not the one.
The pickup artist: First you are astonished by his style intellect and wonderful hair. Then you see the shark tooth necklace and... is that a manicure? Caution! he's a student of pickup manuals like The game and get ready for a date like a general intrigues in battle. Keep in mind that, to him, dating is an activity. You are like Mt Everest in heels, an experiment of his maturity. To succeed his love, you'll have to be his match. Win him at his own sport and call him out on his strategies.
Jeff Cornelius
English 1A
1/28/09
Original Article: http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1953704,00.html
Literal Paraphrase:
Being Kind, it’s what left wing polititians think they do best. President Obama’s actions in the current economy have been the standard blowing of trillions of dollars, to weaken the effect felt. But kindness can have reporcussions that aren’t nice. A prickly economic truth that has to be applied as congress plans to prolong jobless benefits since the recession began.
Constantly pampering unemployed Americans, actually, can lead to high rates of joblessness by twisting incentives to look for work. “The consensus estimates show that unemployment benefits do prolong unemployment spells by quite a bit.” University of Chicago economist, Bruce Meyer states. Who has constructed academic studies on the topic going back to the recession of the nineteen eighties.
We have seen government arrogance go wrong before in this economy. Last February the white house -was resolute in trying to save property owners from loosing there houses, as the market fell – started its 75 billion making home affordable program. This not only failed to change the course of the housing market, but gave false hope to home owners who then threw away money on house payments for a house they would still ultimately loose , ruining their credit ratings. Forecasters now say. Federal efforts to keep residents in their homes that they can’t afford are extending the United States housing crisis, which helps nobody.
Jobless benefits keep currency in the purses of employees who are unemployed due to no fault of their own. It is a safety net – supported by both the democrats and republicans – that also lifts up the larger economy by keeping purchasing money flowing. In regular times, workers normally get 26 weeks of benefits, with the chance of a 13 week extension. With additional extensions passed under George Bush, and Barack Obama. Unemployment benefits can now go for up to 99 weeks or almost 2 years. During the 1982-1983 recession the length of time someone could collect unemployment was 55 weeks.
Jeff Cornelius
English 1a
0800-0850
Free Paraphrase:
Being kind, Democrats perceive themselves as being good at it. The expenditure of trillions of dollars seems to be the president’s standard procedure to lessen the felt impact of the current financial meltdown. However the outcome of mercy can sometimes not be very merciful. A troublesome fiscal fact that the house of representatives must deploy as it debates lengthening jobless aid again, since the onset of the current economic bust, for a total of five times.
It happens to be that the ceaseless alleviation of distressed unemployed citizens, can twist the motivation of people to look for work, and lead to higher unemployment. University of Chicago economist Bruce Meyer says. “The consensus estimates show that unemployment benefits do prolong unemployment spells by quite a bit.” Since the 1980s Meyers has been conducting academic trials on the subject.
Arrogance has gone a rye earlier in this financial situation. The Government in February, steadfast in trying to save citizens from loosing there homes as the economy fell, began its Making Home Affordable agenda with 75 billion. Many residents ran their credit rating into the ground with false hope in the failed program, casting away mortgage expenses on a domicile they would eventually give up. Forecasters say nobody is aided by federal assistance which only woefully extends the agony of the financial disaster by keeping citizens in residences they can no longer pay for.
To employees who were fired blamelessly, jobless perks are paid out to keep currency in their purses. This boosts up the wider financial system by putting money into the system – a security blanket – reinforced by democrats, and republicans. Depending on the commonwealth you reside in employees normally receive 26 weeks of jobless help with the chance of a 13 week prolonging, in regular financial situations. Recent leaders for example presidents Bush and Obama, have filed extensions to the unemployment benefits to where it now lasts for nearly two years or 99 weeks. In the prior economic troubles of the early 1980’s 55 weeks was the longes time someone could collect unemployment.
Christopher Kerr
English 1A
9:00-9:50a
1. Literal Paraphrase
There would be 31 million uninsured people who would gain coverage under the new health care system, and about half would be insured under Medicaid. Medicaid is a state and federal health care that is for people who live in poverty. The Senate bill would make families who earn $29,300 a year insured. However, the House bill would make those earning $33,000 insured. Both those bill are made for families of four making those yearly salaries. Congress believe that Medicaid is thee cheapest and most efficient way to cover people. That is mostly because Medicaid covers some of the cost of paying doctors and hospitals, leaving the states less money to pay. However, states would still be looking at a large amount to pay. There are also some questions that come up about how the new health care system would overwhelm the doctors and hospitals with 15 million new patients.
2. Free Paraphrase
The new health care reform would make the millions of Americans without coverage insured under Medicaid. Families that would benefit from the reform the Senate prefers would be those making under $29,300 for a household of four. However, those that would benefit from the reform that the House prefers would be those making under $33,000 for a household of four. Medicaid is the choice for Congress because it will provide the most, for the least amount of money. The way that Medicaid does the job is it gives a break to the states by paying the hospital workers and the doctors, because now that is left to the private insurance companies. The new cost would be handled by the new bill, and would allow for states to not pay anything for the first two years, and that Medicaid would continue to help out after those two years. This would put big responsibility on the states to maintain this. However, because of the new reform, it would create 15 million new patients for doctors and hospitals.
3. Response to Paraphrasing
If I had to choose one or the other I would pick free paraphrasing, I honestly don't like literal paraphrasing because none of the ideas are mine. Its more of just taking someone else's idea and changing words. I've always been told to not use literal paraphrasing,and after doing exercises with it, I can understand why. Literal paraphrasing is like pushing the limits on stealing ideas. What I like about Free paraphrasing is I feel like I'm actually doing work, I have to actually read and understand what I'm reading. Then I have to change everything about the sentences to make it my own.
Jennie Lo
9:00-9:50am
English 1A
Article 1
San Francisco Chronicle C2 Sunday Jan 24, 2010
S.F. abortion protest draws thousands
By Joe Garofoli (Chronicle Staff Writer)
Emboldened by recent shifts in the political landscape, several thousand anti-abortion activists rallied in San Francisco on Saturday in a march that stretched from the Ferry Building almost to Fisherman’s Wharf.
The sixth annual Walk for Life, organized by two Bay Area women, was bolstered by busloads of marchers drawn from organizations across California. They walked from Justin Herman Plaza to the Marina district.
The event was timed to coincide with the anniversary of the U.S. Supreme Court’s Roe vs. Wade decision, the Jan. 22, 1973, ruling that legalized abortion in the United States. Organizers have staged each of their yearly protests in San Francisco as a symbolic challenge in a city that strongly favors granting women access to abortions.
“Literal” Paraphrase
Encouraged by the latest changes of the political outlook, few thousand anti-abortion protester reassembled in San Francisco on Saturday in a walk that extended from the Ferry Building close to Fisherman’s Wharf.
The sixth year of Walk for Life, ran by two Bay Area ladies, was supported by pile of marchers came from groupings across California. They walked from Justin Herman Plaza to the Marina district.
The function was scheduled to tally with the anniversary of the U.S. Supreme Court’s Roe vs. Wade decision, the Jan. 22, 1973, to legitimize abortion in the United States. Advocates have presented each of their yearly rally in San Francisco as a figurative opposition in a city that extremely favors providing women channels to abortions.
Free Paraphrase
The latest changes of the political outlook encouraged few thousand anti-abortion protesters in San Francisco on Saturday reassembled in a walk extended from the Ferry Building to Fisherman’s Wharf.
A pile of marchers came from groupings across California supported two Bay Area ladies who ran the Walk for Life in their sixth year. The walk started from Justin Herman Plaza to the Marina district.
The schedule of the function was tally with the anniversary of the U.S. Supreme Court’s Roe vs. Wade decision on the Jan. 22, 1973 in order to legitimize abortion in the United States. The yearly rally in San Francisco presented by the advocates is an extremely favors of figurative opposition to provide women channels to abortions.
Jennie Lo
9:00-9:50am
English 1A
Article 2
San Francisco Chronicle C4 Sunday Jan 24, 2010
Tornado warning caps wild day
By Victoria Colliver (Chronicle Staff Writer)
Forecasters had predicted Saturday would offer the Bay Area a respite from the stormy week. Instead, it brought rain, nickel-sized hail and even a tornado warning.
The National Weather Service said at least one funnel cloud was spotted near Brentwood in eastern Contra Costa County around 1:10 p.m., prompting the agency to issue the warning of an imminent tornado touchdown. The threat eased by 2 p.m. and the warning expired.
“We had strong radar signals and we had reports of funnel clouds,” said Bob Benjamin, a weather service forecaster. “We don’t have proof or any eyewitnesses that can validate a tornado, but we do have validation of a funnel cloud, which is a tornado that hasn’t reached the ground.”
Although meteorologists received reports of downed power lines, Brentwood police and Contra Costa County Sheriff’s Department dispatchers said they had no evidence of any damage.
Tornadoes are rare in California and almost unheard of in the Bay Area, but this was the second time in a week that the weather service issued a warning locally. Santa Clara County was put under a tornado warning Wednesday afternoon, but no twister materialized.
“Literal” Paraphrase
Meteorologist had forecasted Saturday would offer the Bay Area a suffering from the turbulent week. As opposed to, it generated torrent, five-cent coin sized hail and an unexpected tornado warning.
The National Weather Service announced minimum one pouring cloud was detected close to Brentwood in eastern Contra Costa County about 1:10 p.m., making the organization to bring up the alarm of the approaching tornado arrival. The warning moderated by 2 p.m. and the alarm stopped.
“We had intense radar signals and we had reports of pouring clouds,” said Bob Benjamin, a meteorologist. “We can’t validate or any evidence that can confirm a tornado, but we do have verification of a pouring cloud, which is a tornado that hasn’t came.”
Even though meteorologists got information regarding the electric power has out of order, Brentwood police and Contra Costa County Sheriff’s Department officer stated they had no record of any injury.
Tornadoes are very seldom in California and almost extraordinary in the Bay Area, however we have twice in a week that the weather forecast announced an alarm in the neighborhood. Santa Clara County has issued a tornado warning Wednesday afternoon, however no twister materialized.
Free Paraphrase
Bay Area will be suffering a turbulent week this Saturday forecasted by meteorologist. However, it came out generated torrent, five-cent coin sized hail as well as an unexpected tornado warning.
Minimum one pouring cloud was detected close to Brentwood in eastern Contra Costa County about 1:10 p.m. announced by the National Weather Service, the approaching of tornado arrival made the organization to bring up the alarm. By 2 p.m. it became moderated warning and stopped the alarm.
Bob Benjamin, a meteorologist stated that our intense radar signal capacity carried out function for the pouring clouds report. Even though we did not have any evidence to validate the existing of the tornado, the pouring cloud is still able to verify the twister is actually but just hasn’t come.
No record of any injury reported by Brentwood police and Contra Costa County Sheriff’s Department officer regardless the meteorologists have confirmed the electric power has out of order.
Tornado warning has been issued on Wednesday afternoon in Santa Clara County even though has no twister materialized. We all surprised about the twice a week incident announced by the weather forecast of an alarm with tornado in the neighborhood of California which is very seldom especially almost extraordinary in the Bay Area.
John Rawson
English 1A
Professor Sabir
8:00 AM-8:50AM
Scott Olster-“Raiders’ Dysfunction Reflects in Receivers”
Literal Paraphrase:
We shouldn’t look past the wide-out position. There’s a direct correlation that this specific job to show the steady drop off of the team. The owners’ fondness for difficult and misunderstood players forced Davis to choose very poor choices on wide receivers through out time, specifically Walker Jerry Porter as well as Randy Moss.
Walker at this time was thought to be an over-the hill, bruised and hurt problem attracter. This image moved Davis’ feelings to great excitement and offered more than anyone else considering no other teams were interested and hired Walker for a six year 16 million dollars promised money.
Problems Followed. Later Coach Lane Kiffin yelled at Walker through the news for his overweight and unconditioned body in the out of season training. Walker traveled to Las Vegas, was filmed showering guests using high-priced champagne, early the following day he was discovered on a Las Vegas road severely assaulted.
Walker participated in 8 contests, made 15 receptions, and was injured. Walker received an operation on his ankle. Before the season, not meeting with the organization, Walker received an operation on his knee inside Israel.
The undercover operation upset Davis. Walker was inactive for every game last season except three. No reason was given by the organization, despite them severely needing savvy receiving experienced players heading the team.
The Raiders have repeatedly put talented personnel on inactive duty without any explanation from the Raiders. This is something only the Raiders do. Some would state that Walker was treated much like former player Marcus Allen.
Jerry Porter was benched for no public reason. Going to a 2006 playing schedule, Porter led the Raiders as their best wide-out. However Walker and Art Shell, the former head coach disagreed about the location of the wide-outs non-season training. At the time Porter left his vehicle in the owner’s space, Davis put Porter in position to be moved to Denver. Porter was inactivated as well as ultimately let go.
The Raiders will pay Walker 4.6 million this coming season, not depending on if he has his teams costume or on where he leaves his vehicle. Al Davis has been depleting his funds. To no surprise.
John Rawson
English 1A
Professor Sabir
8:00 AM-8:50AM
Free Paraphrase
The wide-out position is something we shouldn’t look past. The steady drop off of the team can be directly correlated to this specific job. Walker, Jerry Porter as well as Randy Moss, through time these were some of the poor choices that Davis chose due to the owner’s fondness for difficult and misunderstood players.
Over-the-hill, bruised, and hurt, problem attracter was at the time, all though to describe Walker. Walker was hired for a six year 16 million dollar promised money deal, after offering more than any other team due to Walkers image.
Followed were problems. For his overweight and unconditioned body in and out of season training, Coach Lane Kiffin yelled at Walker. Walker was found early day, on a Las Vegas road severely assaulted, the night before he was caught by camera showering guests with high priced champagne.
Before being injured, Walker made 15 receptions in 8 contests. An ankle operation was received by walker. In Israel Walker received another operation this time on his knee; he didn’t meet with the organization to tell them and got it done before the season.
Davis was upset by this undercover operation. Except for three games, Walker was inactive for ever game last season. Despite severely needing savvy receiving experienced players heading the team, no reason was given by the organization.
Talented personnel have been put on inactive duty without any explanation fro the Raiders repeatedly. The Raiders are the only ones who do this. Walker was treated much like former player Marcus Allen, as some would state.
No public reason was given for Jerry Porter being benched. Porter led the Raiders as the best wide-out on the team entering the 2006 playing schedule. The location of the non-season training for Walker caused a disagreement with Art Shell. Davis put porter in position to be moved to Denver after porter left his vehicle in Davis’ spot. Fired after being registered inactive was Porter.
Not dependent of whether Walker wears the right clothes, or on where he leaves his vehicle, the Raiders will pay him 4.6 million this coming season. Funds have been depleted by Davis. No surprise here.
No learning done.
Response
I felt this was an interesting experienced. I didn’t know too much about paraphrasing and I feel I have a better understanding of it after the exercise. I don’t enjoy writing but I am trying to find a way to like it.
Helena Ortiz
Disaster in Haiti "literal paraphrase"
English 1A MTWTH 9-9:50
The morning started the same for bank loan officer Fabienne Leger,28, that required conducting a statement she was to give the following morning. The floor beneath my table was opening, like it was pulling me down. i began to run but had no luck because the floor was rumbling. After it came to a hault, people began racing to the bottom of the steps to get out. People were tumbling in the stairs, people were chaotic. People were shoving, they had no idea what was happening. They all were racing for their lives.
School let out, and Daniela Rema Pickett, 16 was on her way to her group home on the school bus, which she refers to as a "tap-tap". I was sitting towards the beginning of the bus behind the driver when the catastrophe started. It brang chills through my body. The driver screamed, "Everyone get off and help yourselves." I watched everyone leaping off, but i stay still. After the shock, i got off. People were all over the place yelling "Jesus". I keep to the orphanage. There were no automobiles on the streets. There were only people. I asked them what was going on, but they had nothing to say to me. When they didn't say a word, I was horrified.
From the back of their family home, Rose Franck, a 20 year old college student, was having a relaxing afternoon with her friends. My mother was alone in the house. She was yelling. She had no idea what was going on. She guessed it was the devil, some fictional spirits doing something horrible because the walls were moving in and out, the furniture was shaking. We were attempting to get her out of the bed, but she would not budge. We had to drag her out of the house.
The clip on the streets as heart breaking. Jose Castillo, communications director for the Northwest Haiti Christian Mission, was on a trip in Port-au-Prince and discovered his self roaming the streets with a bunch of others after the disaster hit. Cries were to god, to be saved. Women were searching for their young ones. There were bodies everywhere. A man was screaming in pain: he had just lost a leg. I noticed the heads of children crushed, limbs on the floor, people smothered in blood, people missing their heads-and it was all over. Next to the bodies were young ones wailing. the odor had set in and tears fell down my face. these unwealthy people- how will they go on?
Helena Ortiz
Disaster in Haiti "Free Paraphrase"
English 1A MTWTH 9-9:50
Not even knowing, a disaster hit. Alarms, cloudy weather were not noticeable and gave no precautions. the ground was calm at first. A tragedy started at 4:53 pm on Janurary 12th. Haiti's capital and other places around it were struck by a 7.0 shake. not only did residents lose their place of residence but it was counted over 250,000 hurt, 50,000 people lost their lives by the last minute of the quake. The heroes stories are shared now.
A written report was to be written and presented that day for Fabienne Leger. her table began to open as the ground shook. the floor was trembling which prevented her from running. Workers tried to evacuate as soon as the shaking haulted. Nervously people started collapsing. Without knowledge o the situation, people were shoving. for their small chance at living, people began to escape.
A school bus known as a "tap-tap" riding to an orphanage was carrying a 16 year old girl named Daniela Rema Pickett as school ended Just as the shaking began, daniela was adjacent to the driver. All around the quake trembled her. "Everybody jump off and save yourselves" the driver screamed. I stayed on the school bus as people ran off. I hear everyone yelling "Jesus" as i make my way off the bus. With no automobles in sight I make my way to the group home. Nobody told me what was going on when i asked. I was frightened when they had nothing to say to me.
I was hanging out with my friends in my backyard, says Rose Franck. In my house my mother was alone. Without a clue of what was going on, she began yelling. Everything in the house was moving and my mother thought it was the devil. We had to force her out of the house because she refused to move.
Roaming the streets with countless others after the catastrophe was communications director of Haiti, Jose Castillo. people were found as they heard cries from broken homes. In the bodies of the dead all over the floor were searches for children and cries to the lord. All over the floors were bodies, limbs, body parts, smashed heads and a an who lost his legs. I was in tears as i heard the voices through the dead and smells. Another sad disaster.
David Atchison
English 1A 9-9:50
1/28/10
Literal Paraphrase
The war ended that year, but the militiamen agreed to stop; even though the military agreed to stop they killed over 200,000 people. Most of the population was force to leave their homes and find shelter somewhere else.
Free Paraphrase
All throughout Africa, presidents of different countries in the mother land attended this great celebration. Condoleezza rice graced the event with her presents, who was given a well receive ovation from the people of Liberia. After Mrs. Johnson-Sirleaf gave her vowed to make good on her promise to work more with the U.S. are country promise a great deal of money for the help to rebuild Liberia and such countries as the UN and the European union would agree to back Liberia with rebuilding and troops.
Reflection- this assignment helps me understand what literal paraphrase was and even though this assignment was easy I enjoyed doing it.
Summera Farooq
Eng 1A
Professor Wanda Sabir
Article: Island Nurse off to Haiti to help
“A 35-member team of doctors and nurse from Bay Area is treating injured patient in Haiti,” federal officials said this week.
These are the people who have other jobs in their real life,” said Gretchen Michael of the federal Health and Human Services Department, which is coordinating emergency surgical teams from across the country.
I could not just sit by and twiddle my thumbs while they get back to me,” said retired Alameda nurse Mai Alyschild, who stuffed survival items into her carry-on bag Tuesday as she prepared for a commercial flight Wednesday to the Dominican Republic.
Alyschild planned to take a bus Wednesday from Santo Domingo across the border into Haiti, where she will work on behalf of Humanity First, a Maryland-based humanitarian organization. A former psychiatric nurse at San Francisco General, she has done emergency relief work before in places such as Afghanistan and Kenya.
More than 11,000 nurses nationwide are now signed up with the Oakland-based California Nurses Association to help with relief efforts, but the union continued to face challenges in finding the best way to help.
Most Americans who wish to help the Haitian people have been advised to send money to relief organizations, not to go there, but federal officials say that medical personnel who want to go should register at
www.cidi.org/incident/haiti/10a.
Literal Paraphrase
A group of 35 doctors and nurses from Bay Area are already helping the Haitians.
According to said Gretchen Michael of the federal Health and Human Services
Department these are the people with other actual jobs in life.
I could not rest and look at the heartbreaking situation of Haiti said Mai Alyschild
who packed a few survival things in her carry on and head to Haiti for help.
Alyschild took bus on Wednesday from Santo Domingo across the border
into Haiti, she will work on behalf of Humanity first, and a Maryland-based
Humanitarian organization. A psychiatric nurse at San Francisco General, who
did emergency relief work before in places such as Afghanistan and Kenya.
Over 11,000 nurses all over the country are now signed up with the
Oakland-based California Nurses Association to help with relief efforts, but the
union continued to face challenges in finding the best way to help.
Most Americans who want to help the Haitian people have been inform to
send money to help organizations, not to go there, but federal officials say
that medical staff who want to go should register at
www.cidi.org/incident/haiti/10a.
Response to Paraphrasing
I think free paraphrasing is easier the literal because it is very easy and I know that it is my work. Literal paraphrasing is like stealing someone else ideas. One thing about literal paraphrasing is that I get to learn more synonyms and it expands my vocabulary.
Free Paraphrase
About 35 doctors and nurses from Bay Area went to help Haitian. These are people along with other jobs in life.
Mai Alyschild could not just watch the people. She had to do something, so she took her bag and put some survival items and went to Haiti to help people.
She took a bus across the border in to Haiti. A psychiatric nurse from San Francisco also went to Haiti. She did some emergency relief work in places like Afghanistan and Kenya.
Over 11,00 nurses all over the country are signed up to help the people, but it will be not as easy as you think.
Many Americans want to help one way is to send money to aid organizations; they do not have to go there. Federal officials said that medical team who want to go should register at
www.cidi.org/incident/haiti/10a.
Sideeq Islam
Engl 1A 9:00 - 9:50
Original Article
“What’s In The News”
Imam Noah A. A. Seifullah
Muslim Journal
The United States government had intelligence about a possible Al Qaeda attack around the end of 2009 holidays and had more information about where the suspect had been and what some of his plans were, an official said.
Some of the information was not obvious that it was connected, but in retrospect if it all had been examined together, it would have pointed to a pending attack involving the young Nigerian suspect, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab. Mr. Abdulmutallab allegedly tried to carry out a bombing on a Detroit bound flight on Christmas Day by igniting powder explosives hidden in his underwear.
President Barack Obama alluded to the intelligence in a statement he issued. “Had this critical information been shared, it could have been compiled with other intelligence, and a fuller, clearer picture of the suspect would have emerged,” the President said.
“The warning signs would have triggered red flags and suspect never would have been allowed to board that for America.” Mr. Obama said, “A systemic failure has occurred, and I consider that totally unacceptable.” The President said he would “insist on accountability at every level.”
Mr. Abdulmutallab, a 23-year-old Nigerian who claims links to a branch of Al Qaeda in Yemen, came to the attention of American authorities when his father, went to the embassy to report that his son had become radicalized. The father, a respected retired Nigerian banker, sought help locating him and bringing him home, according to American officials.
The embassy sent a report to Washington that resulted in Mr. Abdulmutallab’s name being entered in a broad database of 550,000 people with possible ties to terrorism. But he was not put on the no-fly list of 4,000 people, or a list of 14,000 people who require additional screening before flying, nor was his multiple-entry visa to the United States revoked.
Sideeq Islam
01-28-10
ENGL. 1A 9:00 - 9:50
"What's In The News"
Muslim Journal
January 15, 2010
Literal Paraphrase
The U.S. government held information concerning a possible Al Qaeda assault near the 09 Christmas season and obtained more intelligence regarding the suspects location as well as what some of his plot was, an authority stated.
Some of the data collected wasn't clearly related, however after the fact if it all had been looked at collectively it would have directed to planned assault including the boy Nigerian accused, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab. Mr. Abdulmutallab supposedly attempted to go through with the blowing up of a of an American city bound plane in air on the most celebrated Christian and American holiday by lighting a bomb tucked away his draws.
President Obama pointed to the information in a press release given. If important evidence would have been shared, it could have been put together with other information, and a more complete and concise picture of Abdulmutallab would have been revealed.
The caution indicators would have set off suspicion and Abdulmutallab would not have been let onto the Airline. A meltdown in our securities infrastructure has happened. Our President demands that responsibility be taken from the highest to the lowest involved.
The suspect, an African in his 20's who says he's connected to a chapter of Al Qaeda in Yemen, was known by US intelligence agencies when his dad, went to the embassy and told that his son was becoming an extremist. The dad is a well received Nigerian banker, looked for assistance trying to find his son and get him home, says US authorities.
The embassy sent information to D.C. which allowed Abdulmutallab's name to be logged in collected intelligence with 550K others with alleged connections to fear based attack systems. The Nigerian wasn't placed on the list prohibiting air travel of 4k folks or a recording of 14K others that need additional viewing prior to air travel, nor was Abdulmutllab's repeat-visit visa to America taken away.
Sideeq Islam
01-28-10
ENGL. 1A 9:00 - 9:50
"What's In The News"
Muslim Journal
January 15, 2010
Free Paraphrase
An authority informed that on Christmas of 2009 the plot as well as the location of the suspect of a possible Al Qaeda assault was known by the U.S. government.
Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, the Nigerian accused, along with the data collected to the planned assault, were not clearly related, but after the fact, if it had all been looked at collectively would have connect. During the most celebrated Christian and American holiday, aboard an American city bound plane, Abdulmutallab supposedly attempted to go through with the blowing it up by lighting a bomb tucked away in his draws.
In a press release given President Obama pointed to the information. A more complete and concise picture of Abdulmutallab would have been revealed along with other information if important evidence would have been shared. The suspect would not have been let onto the airline and caution indicators would have been set off. In our security’s infrastructure a meltdown has happened. Responsibility will be taken from the highest to the lowest agencies involved. Our President demands it.
The suspect’s father went to the embassy and told that his son was becoming an extremist and made it known to U.S. intelligence agencies of the African boy in his 20’s connected to a chapter of Al Qaeda in Yemen. The U.S. authorities said that looking for assistance and trying to get help bringing his son home is all that the respected Nigerian banker wanted to do.
Abdulmutallab’s name was allowed by Washington to be logged in collected intelligence with 550,000 others with alleged connections to terrorists after receiving the information from the embassy. There is a list prohibiting air travel of 4 thousand people and a recording of 14 thousand others that need additional viewing prior to air travel. Abdulmutallab was not on either list nor was his repeat –visit visa to America taken away.
English 1a Julian Shipnuck
9-9:50
LITERAL PARAPHRASE
“All aggressive emotions have similar effects”. John Ruskin stated in some of his more popular writings. They produce falseness in our impressions of external things, which I would generally characterize as the Pathetic Fallacy. Ruskin published,” Of the Pathetic Fallacy” in 1856, as a chapter of “Modern Painters”. His focus for this chapter was poetry, not politics or painting. However his insight may reveal Americas’ political world at the beginning of 2010, specifically the downcast feeling that many of Osama’s supporters are expressing.
When congress meets in a couple days, it will be on the hope to proceeded with a nation wide health care change and a healthcare that possibly, as the president put it on Christmas eve, shortly after senate passed the bill,” the most important piece of social legislation since the social security act in the 1930’s and the most important reform of our healthcare system since Medicare in the 1960s”.
FREE PARAPHRASE
In 1856 John Ruskin published” Of the Pathetic Fallacy”. In this he wrote, “All violent feelings have the same effect. They produce in us falseness in all our impressions of external things, which I would generally characterize as the ‘Pathetic Fallacy’” This could be the explanation for Americas political state of affairs at the begining of 2010. With some of Obamas' supporters have started to question the president ideas and actions.
This all might change if Obamas healthcare bill gets passed. The bill is close to the most important healthcare bill ever passed. However it is still not as important as the social security act of the 30’s. But it is just as, if not more important then Medicare in the 60’s.
Troy Moon
English 1A
8am-8:50am
Literal and Free Paraphrase
1.Literal
Tajuan Porter grew up as an underestimated basketball player. Being the height of only five foot six Porter is use to being the shortest kid on the floor. When porter began to research colleges, it never effected him if he had been looked over because of his height, and he wasnt suprised that only one major school was interested in him. Oregon was the school that happened to have some inside information on the five foot six point guard from Detroit. Porters former teammate Malik Hairston, who graduated from Renaissance Highschool in Detroit. One year before he did, gave up information to his coach at Oregon about Poter, which gave him a really good oppurtunity to prove himself.
2. Free
A five foot six narrative out of Detroit by the name of Tajuan Porter, lives his life as to being the shortest kid on the floor. To be underestimated is nothing new for this kid. Being an inch shorter than his twin sister didnt suprise him when only one major school came after him hard. It never affected Porter that he was looked over because of his height, due to his former highschool teammate Oregon was the one and only school with major interest. Porter has alot to prove over the next few years, and for all the schools that underestimated him as a recruit in highschool missed their chance "its too late" porter states "im already here".
Marlena Ve'e
Enghlish 1A
8-850am
Literal:
Before the earthquake, Ancelot Jean did not own many things other than a home and a carpentry shop that was behind the house. Due to the earthquake he lost about everything, yet he still has his family which consists of his wife and six children. They and thousands of other families are now residing in the Haitian capital’s central plaza, the Champ de Mars. There they prepare their meals and hang their laundry to dry. To shade them they have a green umbrella to keep them cooled. The Champs de Mars has become home for Jean Ancelot and his wife Roselaine Dolce. The family sleeps closely together in their tent to protect each other. Their tent is also surrounded by many other tents of most of their homeless neighbors from Marche Solomon.
Free:
Before Ancelot Jean became famous he did not own many things other than his skateboard, sneakers and broken down motorcycle behind the house. When he became famous he bought about everything that his family could never afford to buy him. One of his favorite memories is last year’s summer when he had his first concert where thousands of fans went to watch his concert at Spain’s Central Plaza. As a luxury he had someone that prepared his meals, did his laundry and even hold an umbrella to shade him from the hot sun. In one of the cities in Spain, Champs de Mars, he met his wife Roselaine Dolce. They tried to go camping one time but forgot to bring a tent. Luckily there were some nice neighboring campers that lent a tent for the night at they enjoyed their night in the mountains March Solomon.
Jade Hooker
Sabir
English 1a
8-9
Literal and Free Paraphrase
Literal:
The world renouned Osama Bin Laden has spread his reign of terror once again. This past Sunday, Bin Laden has sent a release of his audio recording to the U.S. In it, he endorsed his botched attack on Christmas day at a Detroit airport by suicide bomber Umar Abdulmutallab. Investigators found explosive powder in his undergarmets. Bin Laden also spoke about upcoming threats and attacks as long as America continues to support Israel and their proceedings.
Free:
Osama Bin Laden once again alerted the United States government by an failed suicide attempt.A Nigerian man was found at a Detroit airport during Christmas season with bomb powder in his underwear. Officials say that he planned to explode an American flight for Osama bin Ladin.
Valeria Ramos
Professor Sabir
English 1A 8-8:50
1. Orginal passage from article
http://www.prospectmagazine.co.uk/2005/04/afteralife/
A Literal paraphrase 1
B Literal paraphrase 2
C Free paraphrase
A, Literal paraphrase
When the telephone was ringing, Mr and Mrs Su were finishing their breakfast. Nither Mr nor Mrs Su wanted to pick it up at first. Not so many people use their home phone to get tauch with them because not many people know their number. Once a month their son Jian, who is a sophomore in college calls them to tell them how he is doing. He usually spends his free time with his friend's families and he doesn't even give them a poor excuse. Mr and Mrs Su wish to see their son more often, but they don't want to upset themselv and Jian by complaning.
B Literal paraphrase
While the telephone was ringing, Mr and Mrs Su were finishing their breakfast. Nither Mr or Mrs Su wasn't want to pick it up at first. Not so many people use their home phone and even not so many people knew it. Once a month their son Jian who is a sophonmore in college calls them for reporting he is doing good. He usually spends his free time with his friend's families and don't even say something about it.Mr and Mrs Su wish to see their son more often, but they don't want to upset themselvs by complaning.
C Free paraphrase
Just right after Mr and Mrs Su finished their breakfast that only few people knew the phone rains. Of couse neither of them wanted to pick it up. They don't like someone bothering them in the early morning. They don't even want to complaing their son. He is sophomore in college and spends his most free time with his friends families. He only calls them once a month.
summaries from, "After a life".
Mr and Mrs Su are reserved. They have a son who is studing in college and not so colse to them. Their son spends mose his free time with his friend's family. Mr and Mrs Su don't have time to care about other people including their son.
Romina Sarmiento
English 1A 9-9:50
25 Jan. 2010
Literal Paraphrase
Dr. David Ho was in attendance at an AIDS assembly in 2007 while a cartoon demonstration played onscreen. Fellow workers and Ho laughed when they looked at the screen and saw a blindfolded baseball player swing hard at the ball as it was thrown. While the scientists were entertained, they were also serious; they knew the cartoon represented them. Trial and error is what the image was portraying just like the long war to fight AIDS.
Ho recognized the meaning. For about 25 years, he and his colleagues kept swinging but were unsuccessful at making a hit because HIV always stood in the way. Strong drugs used to defeat HIV could only go so far. Only a vaccine could control and stop the spread of HIV. To this day, the dilemma is that a vaccine plan has never been achieved to keep the virus from contaminating new people. "It struck a special chord with me," says Ho of the baseball demonstration. "I think it accurately pictured out chance of success. We all felt that frustration."
Plenty of changes occurred since the assembly, but the primary problem of producing useful protection against AIDS still exists. On the plus side, in 2009, scientists proclaimed that they had produced the first vaccine to show any result to counter the spread of HIV-even though the result is very little. The vaccine's ability to quarantine the risk of new HIV infection 31% is nowhere close to the 70% to 90% that public health experts usually see as the least starting point for a contagious-disease vaccine. Even more inferior in progressing, but still hopeful, are two new antibodies established by a number of researchers working at different labs that appeared to nullify the virus and defeat efforts to infect healthy cells.
The joy over those progressions, however, has been hardened by the still fresh memories of a modest withdrawal in 2007, after a highly awaited shot against the virus was considered a failure. Although no one expected an impressive outcome, nor did anyone presume such a sensational victory and the scientific community is still having difficulty recouping from it. "We are still a long ways away from having an effective HIV vaccine that physicians can reach into the cabinet and pull out in a vial and inject into a person," says Dr. Bruce Walker, an HIV expert at Harvard Medical School.
Free Paraphrase
A demonstration played on the screen at a 2007 AIDS assembly while Dr. David Ho sat in attendance. A blindfolded athlete swung hard at the ball being thrown and Ho and his coworkers laughed. The demonstration represented the entertained but serious scientists. The demo depicted the fight against AIDS as trial and error.
The meaning was recognized by Ho. Ho and fellow coworkers unsuccessfully tried to develop a cure but had been stumped for the last 25 years. There was little that strong drugs could do to counter HIV. A vaccine is the only way to stop the outbreak There's never been a vaccine that has achieved this. "It struck a special chord with me," says Ho of the demonstration. "I think it accurately pictured our chance of success. We all felt that frustration."
Producing useful protection is now the primary issue. The first vaccine to show any result was developed by scientist in 2009. The 70%-90% starting point for a vaccine is not close to the 31% the vaccine is able to quarantine. Researchers established two new antibodies that appear to nullify the virus.
The shot against the virus was considered a failure in 2007. The scientific community is still having difficulty recouping from it even though no one expected an impressive outcome. "We are still a long ways away from having an effective HIV vaccine that physicians can reach into the cabinet and pull out in a vial and inject into a person," says Dr. Bruce Walker, and HIV expert at Harvard Medical School.
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